The power of appreciation!

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During my twelve hours flight from San Francisco to Beijing, I listened to Mark Juliano’s Entrepreneur and business podcast he taught in Carnegie Mellon University. I listened to it a while ago, but I felt it might interest to go over it again and see what I am missing here.

The 4th course is about building a team. Basically he listed out what function everyone has in a company. H also gave out some tips about how to dealing with people. One interesting example he brought up was show sincere appreciation.

He mentioned there is a lady used to work in his company who is very tough. So he paid extra attention to her to found out what she really wanted. It was interesting that the most important thing to that lady was not money, not title or anything else. What she really cared is appreciation when she did things right. After Mark found out that secret, he started to praise her when he saw her do things right. He showed his sincere appreciation to everything she did for him. And it’s amazing to see how she changed her attitude in work place and transformed to be a happier employee.

This story made me thought. I’ve ever heard a quote says: In everyone’s deepest heart, he is craving for sincere appreciation. According to statistics, 70% of the divorce is because of lack of appreciation from their spouse and 80% of employee resign because of lack of appreciation, especially from his/her direct boss. It shows how important appreciation is.

However in our daily life, we like to show our appreciation to strangers when they do a little favor to us, like opening doors for us or something else. But when it comes to close friends and spouse, we like to take everything for granted. We sometimes forget to say, sometimes lazy to say, lots of times we even think, we are so close already; we don’t need to say those vanity words anymore, which is so wrong.

One friend ever told me that there are two types of people in the world. One type is activated by trust (mostly male), the other type is activated by love and support(mostly female). (I found it is so true. Maybe that’s the reason Male and Female’s attitudes are very different. Because our source is different.)

So come back to love and support, what’s love and support truly means and how to show your love and support to the one you care? I guess appreciation is a key element we’ve learned today! Show your love, show your care, and show your gratitude to everything others have done for you. You can use your smile, your words or a thank you card to do so! The format doesn’t matter. What matters most is using your heart when you do so!

I encourage you to try this secret formula for one week to the one you care and maybe you can come back give me some feedback on how it goes. Some sweet things will happen, I guarantee you! 

Me? I am going to see my parent in four hours. Once I see them, I am going to give them a big hug and tell them how appreciate I am to them since they brought me to this beautiful word!

What balance really means in life?

My friend forwarded me a great blogpost by Gurbaksh the other day. It’s a speech by Bryan Dyson. I found it’s an very interesting analogy for life. Thanks Gurbaksh for sharing it with us!

Imagine life as a game in which you are juggling some five balls in the air. You name them – work, family, health, friends and spirit and you’re keeping all of these in the air. You will soon understand that work is a rubber ball. If you drop it, it will bounce back. But the other four balls – family, health, friends and spirit – are made of glass. If you drop one of these, they will be irrevocably scuffed, marked, nicked, damaged or even shattered. They will never be the same.

You must understand that and strive for balance in your life.

How?

Don’t undermine your worth by comparing yourself with others. It is because we are different that each of us is special.

Don’t set your goals by what other people deem important. Only you know what is best for you.

Don’t take for granted the things closest to your heart. Cling to them as they would your life, for without them, life is meaningless.

Don’t let your life slip through your fingers by living in the past or for the future.

By living your life one day at a time, you live ALL the days of your life.

Don’t give up when you still have something to give. Nothing is really over until the moment you stop trying.

Don’t be afraid to admit that you are less than perfect. It is this fragile thread that binds us to each together.

Don’t be afraid to encounter risks. It is by taking chances that we learn how to be brave.

Don’t shut love out of your life by saying it’s impossible to find time. The quickest way to receive love is to give; the fastest way to lose love is to hold it too tightly; and the best way to keep love is to give it wings.

Don’t run through life so fast that you forget not only where you’ve been, but also where you are going.

Don’t forget, a person’s greatest emotional need is to feel appreciated.

Don’t be afraid to learn. Knowledge is weightless, a treasure you can always carry easily.

Don’t use time or words carelessly. Neither can be retrieved.

Life is not a race, but a journey to be savored each step of the way.

Discover the Power Within Yourself

Jewel told us this story in the 2nd session of Dale Carnegie Trainning. I found it’s very inspiring. So I decide to use it as my inspiration closing when I host this weekend’s BayFuBai Business event.

According to an old Hindu legend…

..there was once a time when all human beings were gods, but they so abused their divinity that Brahma, the chief god, decided to take it away from them and hide it where it could never be found.

Where to hide their divinity was the question. So Brahma called a council of the gods to help him decide. “Let’s bury it deep in the earth,” said the gods. But Brahma answered, “No, that will not do because humans will dig into the earth and find it.” Then the gods said, “Let’s sink it in the deepest ocean.” But Brahma said, “No, not there, for they will learn to dive into the ocean and will find it.” Then the gods said, “Let’s take it to the top of the highest mountain and hide it there.” But once again Brahma replied, “No, that will not do either, because they will eventually climb every mountain and once again take up their divinity.” Then the gods gave up and said, “We do not know where to hide it, because it seems that there is no place on earth or in the sea that human beings will not eventually reach.”

Brahma thought for a long time and then said, “Here is what we will do. We will hide their divinity deep in the center of their own being, for humans will never think to look for it there.”

All the gods agreed that this was the perfect hiding place, and the deed was done. And since that time humans have been going up and down the earth, digging, diving, climbing, and exploring–searching for something already within themselves.

Live one day at a time!

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There are two days in every week about which we should not worry,
two days which should be kept free from fear and apprehension.

One of these days is Yesterday with all its mistakes and cares,
its faults and blunders, its aches and pains.

Yesterday has passed forever beyond our control.
All the money in the world cannot bring back Yesterday.

We cannot undo a single act we performed;
we cannot erase a single word we said.
Yesterday is gone forever.

The other day we should not worry about is Tomorrow
with all its possible adversities, its burdens,
its large promise and its poor performance;
Tomorrow is also beyond our immediate control.

Tomorrow’s sun will rise,
either in splendor or behind a mask of clouds, but it will rise.
Until it does, we have no stake in Tomorrow,
for it is yet to be born.

This leaves only one day, Today.
Any person can fight the battle of just one day.
It is when you and I add the burdens of those two awful eternities
Yesterday and Tomorrow that we break down.

It is not the experience of Today that drives a person mad,
it is the remorse or bitterness of something which happened Yesterday and the dread of what Tomorrow may bring.

Let us, therefore, Live but one day at a time.

Effective Presentations that Drive Success

Yesterday I attended a great CINA event called: Effective Presentation that drive Sales Success. Recently I was so busy at packing and do my last minute shopping list before I go on vacation. But since yesterday was Shiliang’s first time to be event manager. So I decided to help him walk through the whole process.

I arrived at Fenwick around 6pm. Held a short meeting with Volunteers and trained them on how to do registrations. Then helped on make sure the everything ran ok.

Around 7:10pm, our workshop started. We have two speakers: Michelle Messina and Deb Siegle. They truely impressed me last night.

First Deb started the workshop on a brief introduction about the American business culture. Amberican business culture could be specified in below points:

1. Direct communicators: Chinese tend to not speak out their true feelings since they consider that’s not respectful. However Americans are very direct communicators. They need feedback. Americans like different opinions, so that they will receive less surprise.

2. Discussions are very direct and at times aggressive –Haha, I know. But it’s productive and effective as well, right?

3. Respect for achievement, success, wealth–Remember the 80-20 rules? You do the 80% of the job, then others will do the 20% for you if they see values in you.

4. Very competitive–of course. Seems this point fits everywhere.

5. Follow through is a critical to creditbility: Either you don’t say it or you need to do it. The difference between follow through and follow up is: Follow through is one step ahead and follow up takes several steps.

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An easiest way to improve your human relations.

I have two nieces. Emily is three and half years old. Jasmine is five months old.

After my first nieces Emily was born, I almost went to see her everyday. Not only because I like her so much, but also because I have time during that period. But after my 2nd niece Jasmine came out, I was super busy for the past months, so I didn’t get much chance to see her yet.

I visited my brother’s home this Tuesday. At that time, Jasmine just wake up. My brother was holding her. I came up and talked to my brother. Jasmine noticed me and looked at me as a stranger.

My instinct reminds me immediately that I need to smile to her. According to a survey. The first impression is very important. She is so young, so she is using her little brain to judge if I am a friend or enemy now. So I started to showed my biggest smile to her. And I started to say: Hey Jasmine, I am Olina! Oh, you are so cute, I like you very much!(God knows if a five months girl can understand it or not. But for sure she can feels it!)

Jasmine kept looked at me for several minutes. Since I was smiling to her. She started to smile back to me. I asked her if I can hold her. Seems she is not object to it. So I started to hold her and played with her. We become great friend.

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The man who inspired me the most in my life.

For Session ten of Dale Carneigien coaching, I need to give a two minutes presentation on a specific person that had an emotional and powerful impact on me, so that I can use the emotions to inspire the group. Below is my presentation.

There is a man who influencd me the most and inspired me the most in my life. He was sent to Rural villiagewhen he was 17, affected by Chinese Culture Resolution. He worked as farmer there for five years. He got married there and had two kids. He learned accounting knowledge by a chance and became an account in the only factory of that village. Later due to his excellent performance, he became the general manager of that factory. His career path went really well. But in order to let his kids receive better education, he decided to give up everything and moved back to the city he grew up.

He started from zero again in the city. He first found a hard labor job in a factory, worked for two years before he found an accountant opportunity. He worked as an accountant for another two years, then be promoted as the general manager of a company. He leaded one hundred people of the company and generated a huge acount of revenue. He became the legend of that industry.

Later he started his own business, he succeed as well. So whenever people mentioned his name, they all admired his widsom and his success. I admired him as well, not only because he was rich or he was success. I admired him because he taught me life is about striving instead of surviving. He always stayed positive. he took good care of everyone around him. He thought from other people’s point of view. He taught me to think big and dare to dream.

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A beautiful Saturday!

Just had a very relaxing day. So before I go sleep, I’d like to share with you my experience today!

In order to celebrate our best friend Jun Loayza’s birthay, Steve, Meghan and I decide to go to beach and work together there. I like Ocean, so we decide beach will be the best destination for us today!

I asked Steve what time shall we meet? Steve suggested maybe we should go early to beat traffic. I’ve been lack of sleep for several weeks. I wantted to catch up some sleep over the weekend. But seems he brought up a good point, we decided to meet in front of Macy’s Valley Fair around 10am.

Around 10:10am, I arrived at Valley Fair and looked for Steve in front of Women’s Macys. But I couldn’t found him. So Meghan and I called him and found he was waitting in front of Men’s Macys. I felt so funny that we are talking about Macys, but while I say Macys, it comes automatically to me it’s women’s Macys. And when it comes to Steve, he was thinking about Men’s Macys. See, how differently people can think about the same thing.

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